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Transcript
  • Bowser: (walks to the kitchen) Chef Pee Pee! I'm starving, I need something delicious, succulent, fresh, full of nutrients. Um.. what else, uh... wait, wait, wait, what's this? (picks up the letter from Chef Pee Pee)

Dear Bowser,

I am on vacation for a few days to visit my family in Mexico. I will be back in a few days, so while I am gone, you are going to have to make food for yourself. I hope you're not mad at me. Cooking isn't hard, I even labeled the main things for you to use like the oven and the microwave. Try your best not to make a mess in the kitchen. See you later alligator!

Love Chef PEEPEE!

  • Bowser: WHAT?!  I NEED SOME FOOD!! HE CAN'T GO ON VACATION!! RAAAHAHHHH!! RRAAAHHH!! IT'S MAKING ME MAD!!! WHAT AM I GOING TO EAT?!  I HAVEN'T ATE IN LIKE TWO HOURS! Hmm... What is there to eat? (looks at the box of Froot Loops) The cereal, huh? Cereal shouldn't be that hard. Uh, what do you need? Um... Cereal.... um... Milk. Milk. Okay! Now where can this milk be? Where is it? Milk? (opens the cabinet) Milk? No. (closes the cabinet) Milk... (opens the microwave) No, it's empty! (slams the microwave door and opens the oven) Empty again! (slams the oven door) Where's the milk!? (groans) Oh, in, it's in the freezer! Duh! (opens the freezer) No. (closes the freezer) Where is the milk? (opens the refrigerator door) Oh, I feel stupid. (grabs the milk and closes the door from the refrigerator) So we got the milk. Um... now what's next? Um... A bowl and... spoon! Okay! Which one's the bowl? Why didn't he label it? He labeled everything else! (looks at the camera) Hey, kids! Do you know which one the bowl is?
  • Kids: The one on the left! Duh!
  • Bowser: Oh, thanks! Ha ha. (grabs the plastic plate instead of the bowl) Got you, I gotcha now! Got the bowl, thanks to your help. (chuckles) Um... Now, what do I need? Uh... Oh yeah, spoon. (groans) Another hard decision! (looks at the camera again) Hey kids, can you help me again? Which one's the spoon?
  • Kids: The second one! The second one!
  • Bowser: Oh, duh! (grabs the banana instead of the utensil) This one!
  • Kids: No!
  • Bowser: Alright, now I got everything to make my cereal, so let's get started. Alright, time to make my cereal. (pours the box of Froot Loops into the plate) A little more, of those munchies. Come on. (pours too much cereal) Oh, alright. (drops the box of cereal and picks up the gallon of milk) Now, to pour the milk. (pours the milk on the cereal) So delicious. A little more. Oh yeah. Now its time for the spoon! Munchin' time! (uses the banana as the spoon to eat the cereal, but the banana is not a utensil) Come on! (slams the banana on the cereal) WHAT IS GOING ON?! THIS ISN'T RIGHT!! This is clearly NOT cereal! You suck, kids! UGH!! I gotta make something else now! What can I make? Cereal didn't work... I need something quick and easy I can eat. Something fast... (gasps) Donuts! How do you open these things? They always make it difficult! There we go. (picks up the doughnut that is not ready to eat) Oh, they're stale! No, no worries, the microwave should help. (puts doughnut in the microwave) Now, um... put on 5... minutes...

(Bowser starts singing as the microwave heats up)

  • Bowser: Microwavin' a donut, 'cause Bowser's hungry! HUNGRY! Microwave! Microwavin' a donut! Cause I'm starvin'! Man, I should've been in a rock band... Microwavin' a donut! Cause I'm starvin'! Starvin'! Guitar solo! (mimics guitar riffs) Waitin' on my food! I am so freakin' hungry! Yeah!

(Microwave dings)

  • Bowser: (gasps) Donut! Donut, donut.... (opens the microwave and as you can see, it wasn't a microwaved doughnut, it was a burned toast) This a what!? What...? This isn't... THIS ISN'T A DONUT!!! WHAT, THIS MAKES NO SENSE!!!! How is a microwave gonna turn a... (as he looks at the Toast Maker sign) Eh, Toast?! Toast maker?! (shreaks)
  • Bowser: Why does everything I could go wrong! First the cereal, I can't even warm a good donut up, without turning it into toast! RAHHH! What can I eat. I need something to eat! Why can't I find anything to eat! (groans) Pizza! I, I can order some pizza. I have some money. Oh, it's a coupon! Yes! I'ma order this pizza! $10 Dinner Box! Oh yeah! Where's the phone! Oh yeah! Okay, I got the phone. Um, now what's the number? Uh... Okay. (dials the number) Okay.

(ringtone)

  • Pizza Guy: Yeah! Delivering fake pizzas! Ha ha. No body's going to stop me. Can't wait to deliver the next one. Heh heh. Yes. (phone rings into his pocket) You scared me. (answers the phone) Um, hello, rip-off, I mean, pizza! Pizza, eh, um... Yes... 
  • Bowser: (on the other end of the phone) I would like to order a large pizza. 
  • Pizza Guy: Uh... A large pizza, yes. 
  • Bowser: (on the other end of the phone) With extra pepperoni. And have it to me right now! 
  • Pizza Guy: Okay, okay. Uh... (Bowser still talking on the phone) Um... Okay, okay. 
  • Bowser: (on the other end of the phone) ...and hurry up!... 
  • Pizza Guy: Okay, I got you. I got you! (hangs up) Oh well, I had to, okay, I gotchu. Fake pizza come to you! Ha ha! (stops the car and opens the window door up) Gotta deliver this fake pizza. Ha ha! Make me some quick money. Kay. (closes the car door and went up the stairs to the house, then knocks the door). 
  • Bowser: Oh, pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, PIZZA!! OOH, where's the pizza?! (opens the door) Thank you, finally! 
  • Pizza Guy: It's Pizza Hut. 
  • Bowser: Give me the pizza, now! 
  • Pizza Guy: Here's your pizza, sir. (gives Bowser the pizza) Sixty dollars. 
  • Bowser: Give me the pizza. (gives the pizza guy the money
  • Pizza Guy: Here you go. 
  • Bowser: Here. Get the money, go! Please, go! 
  •  Pizza Guy: Yeah! Heh. (starts running with the money)
  •  Bowser: You had to run that fast.
  •  Pizza Guy: (keeps running) Got the money. I got the money! (keeps on running until he reaches to the car, then gets in the car) Go! Go! Go! (the pizza guy starts the car and drove off, and took the money with him)
  •  Bowser: Hey! Why is he running? (opens the box and reads the sign) You Suck! Learn to Cook! What?! Where's my pizza? (hits the door) PIZZA!!! For me? PIZZA A-A-A!! What am I gonna eat? Why?! Why can't I get anything to eat? I didn't get any pizza when people ripping me off! (groans) I should be even more mad! (sniffs) I just want to eat. (sniffs) What is there to eat? (gasps and looks at the image of the cheeseburger at Wendy's) Oh, Wendy's. (whispers) What a succulent burger. (smooches the image) Ooh, I'm gonna get some Wendy's! But I can't drive. (gasps) Koopa, he has his license. Koopa! Where are you? KOOPA!!
  •  Koopa: Bowser, Bowser. What is it? What is it?
  •  Bowser: Hey! Do you have your license?
  •  Koopa: Yeah, I got it the other day, I told you.
  •  Bowser: Okay, Um... I need you to drive me to Wendy's right now! I'm starving!
  •  Koopa: Drive you to We...
  •  Bowser: I need something to eat! Where is... Come on, go and get the car. Where's the car?
  •  Koopa: But it... Wendy's night time, and I really have...
  •  Bowser: DON'T MAKE ANY EXCUSES!
  •  Koopa: I don't have the car right now, my friend Tiddo does, he de...
  •  Bowser: Wha--
  •  Koopa: ...he delivers pizza.
  •  Bowser: Get it from him! I NEED TO EAT RIGHT NOW!!
  •  Koopa: Okay, okay, I'll call to see if I can get the car fro...
  •  Bowser: (interrupts) HURRY UP!!!!!!
  •  Koopa: Okay, okay. (holds the key) Okay, Bowser, I got the key, let's go.
  •  Bowser: Alright, good. Go! GO!!! GO!!! (pushes Koopa)

(Koopa and Bowser are outside at night)

  •  Koopa: Okay, Bowser, be very ca...
  •  Bowser: Wendy's, Wendy's, Wendy's, Wendy's, Wendy's, Wendy's, Wendy's...

(They're inside the car)

  •  Koopa: Okay, Bowser, close the door, come on, come on, let's go. (Bowser shuts the door)
  •  Bowser: Alright, pull off. Go!
  •  Koopa: Okay, okay, I gotta...
  •  Bowser: I'm hungry!
  •  Koopa: I gotta explain something to you real quick.
  •  Bowser: WHAT?!
  •  Koopa: Okay. I'm not really good at driving at night. So, if I, like...
  •  Bowser: You got eyes, don't you?
  •  Koopa: Yeah.
  •  Bowser: Okay, see the road, and GO!!
  •  Koopa: Oh, okay.
  •  Bowser: Hurry up!
  •  Koopa: Okay, I go. Let me... Let me... start the engine. (starts the car) Okay.
  •  Bowser: Jeez!
  •  Koopa: Okay... now...
  •  Bowser: You're slower than a turtle.
  •  Koopa: And now, how do use... do... reverse. (pulls the gear lever) Okay. (presses the brake pedal) AH! We're moving! AH!! AH!!
  •  Bowser: Duh. (Koopa screams)
  •  Koopa: Okay, Bowser. Um... I'm not really sure what to do right here.
  •  Bowser: Hurry up!!
  •  Koopa: It says "stop" though.
  •  Bowser: I don't care.
  •  Koopa: It says... I gotta stop.
  •  Bowser: Do you see police? NO!
  •  Koopa: Yeah...
  •  Bowser: That means "Go!".
  •  Koopa: I gotta... I gotta turn...
  •  Bowser: Go!
  •  Koopa: ...the signal.
  •  Bowser: Red means "Go!".
  •  Koopa: Hold on.
  •  Bowser: Green means "Go!".
  •  Koopa: I gotta look both ways...
  •  Bowser: Orange means "Go!".
  •  Koopa: There's a...
  •  Bowser: Go!!
  •  Koopa: There's a car com...
  •  Bowser: There's Wendy's, on the line.
  •  Koopa: Okay...
  •  Bowser: GO!
  •  Koopa: I'm going! I'm going. Okay. I'm gonna made it. (drives forward) Okay.
  •  Bowser: Course.
  •  Koopa: Now...
  •  Bowser: Dork.
  •  Koopa: Just had to keep your eyes on the road.
  •  Bowser: Yeah.
  •  Koopa: Gotta keep your eyes on the road. (on their way to Wendy's) Okay, Bowser...
  •  Bowser: Wendy's! I see it. Wendy's!
  •  Koopa: Well, okay, cal...
  •  Bowser: Do you hear me?
  •  Koopa: Yeah, we're almost there...
  •  Bowser: Wendy's!
  •  Koopa: Okay, we're almost there, calm dow...
  •  Bowser: Wendy's!!
  •  Koopa: We're almost there, calm down, calm down, okay, okay, calm down.
  •  Bowser: We need to be calm. We're about to get your sandwich. Be calm.
  •  Koopa: Okay. Let's... come on. Let's go. Right there. (points to the sign that says "Wendy's") Wendy's right there. Do you see it?

(they arrived at the Wendy's place)

  •  Koopa: Okay, Bowser...
  •  Bowser: WENDY'S!!!!!!
  •  Koopa: I know, we're here...
  •  Bowser: Wendy's!!!!!!
  •  Koopa: Do you wanna go to the drive...
  •  Bowser: Drive-thru! Drive-thru! Go! Go!
  •  Koopa: The drive-thru?
  •  Bowser: Yes!
  •  Koopa: Okay, let's go.
  •  Bowser: Quick food, go!
  •  Koopa: (sighs) Okay. Drive-thru.(at the drive thru) Okay, Bowser, what do you want? What do you want?
  •  Bowser: Okay, I want a cheeseburger. Get a cheeseburger.
  •  Koopa: Okay, calm down, okay...
  •  Bowser: I want a cheeseburger...
  •  Koopa: Okay, cheese...
  •  Bowser: And, wait... with cheese on it.
  •  Koopa: Okay, okay, a cheeseburger, okay.
  •  Bowser: Yeah.
  •  Koopa: Okay, okay, hold on.
  •  Bowser: CHEESEBURGER!!
  •  Koopa: Calm down. Calm down, we just gotta wait for our turn.
  •  Bowser: Cheese...
  •  Koopa: We gotta be patient. (Bowser drooling while looking at the burger) This is the real world, we gotta... We gotta be patient.
  •  Bowser: Looks so good.
  •  Koopa: Yeah, we gotta be patient for the guy.
  •  Bowser: Oh, spicy hot, homestyle, oh, those chicken sandwiches look good.
  •  Koopa: Okay, we'll get you a cheeseburger, just calm down. It's almost our turn.
  •  Bowser: Burger...
  •  Koopa: It's almost our turn. It's almost our turn. (stares at the yellow truck and waits for it to move, but Koopa gets pissed off) Come on, guy, move. (the truck moves) Damn it!

(They're finally at the order station)

  • Koopa: Okay, here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Okay. Okay.
  • Man: Welcome, may I take your order?
  • Koopa: Uh... just one second. (at Bowser) What do you want?
  • Man: Take your time.
  • Bowser: I WANT A CHEESEBURGER!!!!!!
  •  Koopa: Shh! Uh... can I get a one cheeseburger?
  •  Bowser: I want a cheeseburger with cheese on it.
  •  Koopa: One cheeseburger.
  •  Bowser: I need cheese. (the man calculates their order)
  •  Koopa: That's it. That's all I want.
  •  Bowser: Answer me!!
  •  Man: So, it was $6.78 from the...
  •  Koopa: Okay, thank you.
  •  Bowser: Hurry up!

(outside of the drive-thru)

  •  Koopa: Waiting for the cheeseburger, man. I can't wait.
  •  Bowser: WHERE'S MY BURGER?!?
  •  Koopa: There she is.
  •  Bowser: Yes! Yes!
  •  Koopa: There she is.
  •  Bowser: Burger...
  •  Koopa: Okay.
  •  Lady: Thank you sir, thank you for your order.
  •  Koopa: Thank you.
  •  Bowser: Thank you,.
  •  Lady: Hey, you guys are not leaving, you know, yelling through the drive-thru.
  •  Bowser: I don't care. Hurry up!! Go!! PULL OFF!
  •  Koopa: Cheeseburger!!
  •  Bowser: PULL OFF!
  •  Koopa: Cheeseburger!!
  •  Lady: No, stop! That's very disrespectful.
  •  Koopa: Leave.
  •  Lady: No.
  •  Koopa: Go!
  •  (Koopa and Bowser laughs)
    SML Movie Bowser's Dilemma11:26

    SML Movie Bowser's Dilemma

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